# 84
Robert Wolter to Brian
Jun 9, 2009
Man, I totally understand where you’re coming from as far as putting your partner through crazy situations.
The truth is, I always felt really guilty for the long hospital stays that would leave _____ alone at home and having to maintain the house and take care of all of the animals. On the flipside, I would always lobby for us to simplify our lives regarding all the animals to eliminate stress not only for me, but also for _____. In the end, we just had different perspectives on what kind of lives we wanted to live and (at least this is the way I feel) she wasn’t willing to budge on anything. It always had to be on her terms. But she was there for me in my darkest moments with my family at times when people thought I wasn’t going to make it and I can’t imagine the pressure of those situations. There were a lot of other factors as well and I don’t blame my CF for the breakup, just a piece of the puzzle.
This whole experience has made me truly question the existence of a “soul-mate” or the idea that you can spend your whole life with one person. I feel like I fall in love with people all the time and I wouldn’t want to miss an opportunity to share something with someone because I was in a committed relationship. At least that’s the way I feel now, it will probably change as time passes.
Being close to my family right now is really helpful and makes me feel safe in case anything crazy were to happen. I do want to start doing Yoga and figure out ways to improve my lung function and really work at it. The Cepacia is a royal pain in my ass though and every day is a different challenge.