# 41
Brian McTear to me
Feb 23, 2009
When I was 18 I was pretty sure that I was going to be a rock star, so I wanted to take a year off before college and make that happen … skip college all together. Some of my closest friends, including one of the guys in my band, assumed I didn’t have long left, and that’s what I was doing! It was weird because, especially back then, I was SO healthy. I mean, arguably a lot healthier than those guys! People just project their fears all the time. It’s one of the things that sucks about having an illness is that people are sometimes ready to project their fears for you before they need to.
I am psyched to read your dream blog. I have just started writing a blog for Weathervane Music, the non-profit organization I am trying to establish. If you are interested, the address is wvmusic.tumblr.com. I am just getting started with it. And we should totally put something together. Even if we just take our emails and upload the correspondance to a blog… We could edit out whatever we don’t want people to read, but I bet some people would like to read it. I’ve been rereading our emails, so I know someone out there would be interested!
Regarding the mentoring: You know, when I was 19 I was at one of my last doctor visits at CHOP. While I was waiting this young couple was getting the results from their kid’s CF test, and I saw them just moments after finding out. It was unbelievable. I actually wrote a letter to them right there and asked the receptionist to give it to them since I was sure they weren’t in the mood for talking. I said I basically didn’t know much about other people with CF’s experience. I was pretty sure that I had a milder case than many, but that I had a promising and happy life, and they shouldn’t assume any less for their child. I am not sure what I said was well informed, or mature, but the receptionist read it and wiped a tear. It was a touching moment.
So I like the thought of making something like that. Adults with CF talk to parents of and/or children with CF.
I sort of suspect that dreams are actually momentary insights into another reality or existence that is most likely not on the time line, and maybe in many cases not even attached to the physical world. Again, If you can entertain the idea that time is not real, then a thread of connection between lives that would seem to be on different parts of the timeline really could be as simple as opening a momentary channel between those lives. Dreams would be a perfect place for those threads to expose themselves to each other. Imagine how crazy it would be to exist in another life, and in a dream that boy or girl, man or woman …or Trafalmadorian… is getting glimpses into playing drums, walking through a house with different animals in each room, and having CF!
I like thinking about these things.
And for what it’s worth, in the Seth books, they talk about people very commonly keeping close to their loved ones…in one existence you are brother and sister, in another you’re mother and son, best friends, etc.
Here’s a crazy related story: My sister Nancy is 5 years older than me. Her mother in law died in 1994 or so. About 2 years later, she had her daughter Molly. One time after she took Molly to see her grandfather (Nancy’s father in law), just as they were driving away from the house, Molly (maybe 3 at that point?) said to Nancy, “I used to live there, exept when I lived there I was the Mommy and Daddy was the little boy!” Nancy said the hairs on her neck stood on end for the whole ride home.
B